Friday, March 22, 2013

Field Trip Buddies

I have been out of Elementary School for awhile but I assume you still pick a partner when you go on a field trip. I am not sure where this idea originated but I suppose it is harder to misplace two kids as opposed to one.
Field trip buddies can also help keep you safe, and hopefully enhance your overall trip experience, which seems like a good thing in most situations.I have had many, many good companions as I have journeyed through life.
My first field trip buddy was my little sister.
We are less than a year apart in age and we shared a room for many years.
I was always fascinated by the talents she had that I did not possess.
Anyway, we journeyed through our parent's home and very early years together.
She is still willing to be my field trip buddy. And she still has what it takes to be a good one. She is a good listener, she is dependable, and she can be counted on to bring some humor to the situation.
She makes me feel safe and she enhances my experience.

One of my favorite TV shows is Survivor.
It is a genius game.
A very important thing a contestant must do to survive is pick buddies or allies.
Who will preserve their life? Who will get them farther in the game?
I have never seen anyone win the game that did not find a way to surround themselves with the right people.
For the most part, I think I have surrounded myself with the right people.
My best friend, Sally, is a good example. It would be hard to find a more giving and loyal friend.
Currently, one of my favorite things to do is observe my two granddaughters, who are also sisters, be field trip buddies. Even though they are only 3 and 5, they get it.
If one of them thinks you are not treating the other one fairly, they will firmly and directly let you know.
They spend so much time together playing, sleeping, eating, bathing, it is hard to imagine they will ever find new buddies and grow apart. But they will. A little.
However, I don't think time will ever erase their desire to make sure the other one is okay.
I continue to try to learn to be a good field trip buddy. It can be a lifelong lesson for some of us.
I like to think at times, I have helped some of my buddies feel safe. And I hope I have enhanced some of their experiences.
You are never too old to lose your way occasionally. 
Assigning field trip buddies is an outstanding way to make sure everyone is okay and no one gets lost.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

The Sofa Sleeper Incident

I am a girl who needs her sleep.
I used to lose a lot of it when my kids were out of school for summer vacation.
One night, several years ago, I decided it was time for bed.
I turned on the big screen, pulled out the leather sofa sleeper in the family room, and told 8 year old Brynly and 10 year old Braeden they could watch TV if they were quiet.
I also told them their 13 year old brother, Taylor, was sleeping at a friends house so I had already locked up.
After tossing and turning in my hot bedroom for an hour and a half I finally fell asleep.
About an hour later I woke up to someone screaming.
And this was no ordinary scream.
This was a "someone is chopping my head off" kind of scream.
It took me a minute to wake up enough to figure out the sound was coming from the family room.
When I got downstairs and yelled, "What the hell is going on?" all I could see was Braeden running around the room.
"Where is your sister?" I screeched.
He pointed to the closed up sofa sleeper.
My 8 year old daughter was folded inside the sofa sleeper which was now pushed down inside the couch.
I  stood there for a good 60 seconds trying to figure out if anyone had ever told me what to do in this situation.
No one had.
I had visions of cutting the couch to pieces with a knife.
It was less than a year old and it wasn't cheap.
I told Braeden to quit freaking out and help me pull the sleeper back out.
He had already tried and another person pulling did not make much difference.
It wouldn't budge.
We put our legs up on the edge of the couch for leverage and pulled.
It still wouldn't budge.
My daughter's screams were starting to become hysterical.
I was trying to figure out if I could handle the embarrassment of calling 911 when I reached my hand down inside the couch to comfort her.
Her little head was covered in sweat.
I asked her if she could breathe and she said she could but it was tight.
I knew this had to be resolved soon or I was going to have to call the authorities.
Taylor was bigger and taller and I thought he might be able to do it.
I told Brynly I was going down to the neighbors' house to get her brother.
She started to scream again and said she was going to die while I was gone.
I told her she would be okay but I had to get some help quick. 
When I got to the neighbors house, even though it was close to midnight, the man of the house, Blake, was outside working on a car. I asked him where Taylor was and he said the boys weren't there. They were out screwing around somewhere.
I made a mental note to ground Taylor later.
Blake asked me if I needed some help and I said yes and started running back to my house.
Unfortunately, he had a sprained ankle and couldn't keep up with me but his wife, Lori, overheard the conversation from their front door and was right behind me. 
I had not said what the emergency was so when we got into my family room, Lori just looked at me.
She could not figure out where the screaming was coming from either.
I pointed to the sofa sleeper.
She got a funny look on her face. Then we both started pulling.
After a couple of tries, up came the sofa sleeper and a very scared and sweaty girl.
I thanked Lori and she left. I can't imagine what she must have been thinking.
Brynly and Braeden cried and cried.
When they had calmed down a little I said, "What the?"
They said they were playing "taco" and they never thought the springs were strong enough to pull a 60 pound person into the sofa.
What is the moral to the story?
There is none.
This is just a humorous story that shows you that stuff happens.
Okay, maybe there is one. Never underestimate the power of a spring. 






Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Eminem and Codependency

Am I really going to write a post about Eminem?
Yes I am.
He entered my radar when I watched The 40 Biggest Celebrity Feuds on VH1.
Man, I love myself some VH1. Only in America.
Anyway, my favorite was the feud between Mariah and Nick Cannon vs. Eminem.
Now I am not sure who started this whole thing but if it was Mariah and Nick, they are not too bright.
It is pretty obvious Eminem does not have a sensor and anyone that ticks him off will become the subject of a colorful and quite possibly violent free style.
What did Mariah think was going to happen when she dressed up like Slim Shady?
And sorry, Nick. It does appear your wife did hook up with Marshall and he has the voice mail messages to prove it.
It is hard to root for the Cannons when they obviously did not do their homework. 
Anyone should know Eminem does not back down from a fight.
Just listen to his music.
Just ask his mom and Kim.
VH1 could devote a whole show to Eminem feuds.
He has some serious anger management issues and I am just glad he has better things to do than read obscure blogs.
Coincidentally, I also watched 8 Mile on MTV a few days ago.
Yes, family and church friends, I did say I watched VH1, MTV, and 8 Mile all in the same post.
Don't judge me.
I have to say, 8 Mile wasn't too bad and Eminem can be super hot for the short periods of time when he is not talking.
But after one listens to his views on women it is hard to understand why anyone would get involved with him. Why would Mariah get involved with him?
Yes, he is famous and he has a lot of money.
Yes, he works out and he has a great body. 
He also overcame an erratic and underprivileged childhood and went on to become the best selling artist of the 2000s.
But I don't think it is about any of those things.
And I don't think women care about those things as much as he thinks they do. 
I think women get involved with men like him because women are women.
When people are hurt they want to make them better.
When people are angry they want to calm them down.
I am not a big fan of generalization but I don't think men buy into the belief that loving kindness can change a person like women do.
Women are fixers and much more likely to be codependent.
I don't know who Eminem is going to date next or if he is even on the market.
But here is my best advice.
Don't mess with him.
(I am not sure why I am messing with him).
Because we all know the best predictor of the future is the past.
And the whole thing is likely to end up as an angry rant.
Or better yet America, a countdown show on VH1.





Saturday, August 25, 2012

True Love

I am about a 4 out of 10 on the mushy scale.
I can enjoy a chick flick once in awhile but I would rather watch a Bourne movie.
I am also pretty private so I hope I don't regret publishing this post....
But here it goes.
I am no expert on true love.
I have only been in love once. I have had 3 or 4 serious likes, and I gave marriage my best shot once and failed. 
But I think I still have a right to an amateur opinion.
One day my boss and I had to call a longtime customer I will call Will.
Before they got down to business, "Will" and my boss had some laughs reminiscing about some of their interactions over the years.
Will is 99 years old and sharp as a tack.
When my boss brought up Will's (still living) 102 year old wife, "Helen", Will said, "Oh Helen? We're crazy about each other".
Not what I expected.
I have no idea how long this couple has been married but I think 75 years would be a conservative guess.
75 years of marriage can breed a lot of boredom and resentment.
100 years of life can wear you out.
But Will still finds something on this earth he is crazy about. And he did say "they are crazy about each other" so he sounds pretty confident his wife is still crazy about him too.
When my son was small, I used to drive him about 10 miles down busy Redwood Road to preschool.
After I had made this trip a few times, I noticed an older man was always walking down that road with a plastic ice cream bucket swinging from his hand.
I wondered many times where he was going.
Later, I saw an article in the newspaper stating a pedestrian was hit and killed on Redwood Road. These types of accidents are always sad, but this one was particularly tragic because the deceased was a 75 year old man that walked down that road everyday to the cemetary to water to the flowers on his wife's grave.
Was this my man with the ice cream bucket? I will never know. But I do know I never saw my man walking down Redwood Road again. 
How do people stay crazy about each other after 75 years of marriage?
What compels someone to make a long walk down a busy, and somewhat dangerous, road everyday to tend a grave?
I hope you don't think I know. That is the million dollar question.
But here is what I do know.
Some of it has to be a choice.
Choosing to see the good instead of the bad.
Choosing to work together instead of against each other.
I have always thought the way you speak about your loved ones says a lot about your character. 
I don't know if I will live to be 102 or 99 or even 75.
But I do hope when I near the end of my life I am still crazy about someone and they are crazy about me. 
Because I like to think people can choose to have great relationships that withstand trials and old age.
And that is my amateur opinion on true love.


Monday, July 2, 2012

Being Oprah Rich and Independence Day

Most Monday mornings, when the alarm goes off, I think of Oprah Winfrey.
According to Forbes Magazine, Oprah Winfrey was worth 2.7 billion dollars near the beginning of 2012. 
And she didn't even make the list of the top 20 richest women in the world for this year. Poor Oprah.
Oprah never has to work another day in her life if she so chooses. And she pretty much has access to anything or anyone, including the President of the most powerful nation on the planet. But that is another post.
Now I have read enough about lottery winners and the very rich to know mega money has its challenges.
I know; someone reading this is already saying give me those challenges, I would be happy to deal with them.
But to be fair, if you were Oprah rich it would be very hard to know who your real friends are. People would constantly be trying to work their way into your inner circle. And not because they love and care about you but because they are hoping you will write them a couple of checks.
I heard Oprah tell a story once about how she got an "emergency" phone call in the middle of taping a show. When she got to the phone it was a family member asking her to talk to the Mercedes dealership because they had the dire need to drive away in a new car on her dime.
I happen to believe in most cliches and I am sure it is very lonely at the top.
Being mega rich would also take incredible self control.
Besides working out and a couple of things in regard to your personal hygiene, you could pretty much hire someone to do anything and everything else.
I have to wonder if I would forget how to cook, do my own makeup and hair, clean, and drive.
Would you even sign birthday cards and purchase gifts or would someone else do that for you?
I am afraid I might end up like Jabba the Hut or the people in the movie Wall E.
I have also decided I would never want to be rich due to celebrity. Too much exposure and too many cameras.
I think the character in the movie About a Boy is the kind of rich I would like to be.
He is living off the royalties from a Christmas song his Dad wrote.
He is comfortable enough to have a lot of freedom and access but not so rich he has scammers and paparrazi camped outside his door.
I don't have to drive too far to find people who appear to be living in more prosperous circumstances. I also don't have to drive too far to find people who are not. I see them downtown everyday.
Someday when this life is over, there are things I will miss.
Paying bills and trying to figure out how to get my finite resources to stretch will not be one of those things.
But even more I thank the Supreme Being that I live in America. A country where a woman can own a home and get an education.
I know there are women in this world that only dream of having the freedom and opportunity I enjoy.
I feel I have been able to live the American Dream. I think Oprah would say the same.
Next Monday, when my alarm goes off, I might wish again I was Oprah Winfrey and I could decide whether I wanted to continue to work or not.
But later in the morning, when I say my prayers, I will thank God I live in America.
Happy Independence Day. 




Sunday, June 24, 2012

Honesty


I have been thinking a lot about honesty. I believe honesty requires courage.
Before I go further let me clarify. I have known some people in my life that have prided themselves on being honest but actually they were just blunt.
Honesty does not have to be harsh, and the Chelsea Handler version is not what I am talking about.
Sometimes it is better not to tell someone you don't like their new haircut, outfit, or spouse.
How does that type of honesty serve anyone?
I am talking about the kind of honesty that serves someone else and usually not yourself.
Like the person that backs into someone's car and leaves a note even though no one was watching.
Breathtaking honesty.
And I think it is one of the hottest attributes a person can have.
I immediately fell in love with a boy in the 2nd grade because he turned in some money he found on the playground.
Even at that young age I recognized this small act was unselfish, courageous, and kind of heroic.
I lost touch with this boy but I am sure he has grown into an unselfish, courageous man.
Some of the best conversations I have had in my life have been with people willing to tell the truth about their feelings, things they have learned, or their own mistakes.

One of my favorite fictional characters in literature is Valjean from Les Miserables. After stealing from a great man he decides to live a more honest life. Some could argue he continues to live a lie but I think he becomes a man of integrity which leads to a life of courageous service to others.
Masters of small things become masters of great things.
I hope to find more breathtaking honesty in the world.
I hope to find more breathtaking honesty in myself.
And to be honest, I had a crush on that boy in the 2nd grade not only because he was honest, he was pretty cute too.



 


Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The Ideal Birthday

It is the eve of the anniversary of my birth. Again.
I decided I wanted to share an example of what a perfect birthday would be like for me.
I wake up at 6 a.m. in Disneyworld. I put on my princess costume and jog on over to the Magic Kingdom and run the Princess Half Marathon in 2 hours.
I jog back to my room, not worn out but energized, and shower. Then I meet the whole extended family at the Crystal Palace for breakfast. Yep, they are all there. Every last one of them. I get my picture taken with Tigger.
We ride the bus over to Disney Studios (still with extended family) and ride the Tower of Terror, Soarin, and the Rockin Rollercoaster numerous times. Of course, Steve Tyler is there so I ride a few times with him. Man, he screams loud!
It just so happens my BFF, Sally Miller, and her family are at Disney Studios as well so I meet them for lunch at the Sci Fi Drive In.
Now I am kind of tired so time stands still for 3 hours while I read a book, have a nap, and help the gardeners plant some flowers.
I go hang out with the family until dinner time.
Then I meet Matthew Crawley from Downton Abbey for a quiet dinner.
Time stands still again.
We go watch Fantasmic together and he buys me a glow stick.
We meet up with the family at the Magic Kingdom for more rides and fireworks.
The End

Hey, it's a birthday wish which is nothing like an everyday wish and it can defy the laws of nature.
Happy Birthday to me.